I just can never seem to get it right.
How can she say that I am not her type?
After the constant phone calls and the facebook messages
And listening to you talk about all of your annoying relatives.
I thought that you and I could’ve been something.
I know now you think all guys are just after one thing.
Especially after the last guy and what he did to you
And I thought since I was the person you came running to.
That maybe, eventually there could be something between us
And you would believe me when I say I am not thinking of my penis.
When I say I long to hear your voice, even if it's only for a little while
And I love the way your delicate dimples develop whenever you smile.
I even love the way you chew your nails wildly whenever you’re nervous.
So when my suppressed feelings for you begin to pierce through the surface
And I confess all of the affection held captive in my chest.
You say that you love me but you can only see me as a best...
This where the memory begins to turn hazy
And where I wish the ground would cave in and take me.
Back to the start of this very scene,
The part where my feelings remained in my dreams.
Because maybe then you wouldn’t see me in a different light
And we would still be up on the phone to each other all night.
I would rather hold it all in and resist the urge to ever mention
My feelings for you, if it meant we could keep our connection.
When I first read this poem as a reader, I have to say that I was very impressed. It's easy to find on the internet quite a bit of slack on men and women when it comes to being put into the infamous 'friendzone.' While I can say that I can not vouch for the emotional trauma that is claimed with the zone, I can deduce with my wonderful detective skills that this poem has reached out to quite a few people who have had this experience.
Now it's to move onto the actual poem itself.
Very fluid movement in the poem
Controlled rhyme-scheme that you should be proud of. I love the use of almost rhyming words like “messages” and “relatives.”
Having a very strong emotion in the poem which really makes the reader feel sorry for your troubles.
Your stanzas are broken up into three sections. It gives the impression of having a story with a beginning, middle and end. I like this because it's giving the poem some sort of centre to it. It's not a free-verse which is flying all over the place.
In future poetry, the biggest suggestion I'm going to give you is not to pick such a common theme. There is nothing wrong with writing about the common poetry topics like fear, romance or love, but I'm suggesting this out of positivity. You're a good writer, I bet you could put this amount of emotion into some abstract and wonderful idea.
I have see from your other poetry that you have done this. With interesting topics like, “Hunting of the Job,” and “Happy New Year.”
With a poetic mind such as your own, I hope you find more time for writing creative pieces like this and more.
...I wish I could write like you. I've never said that to anyone before, all my loooong years on this earth! :thumbs::up:
just because you like her doesn't mean she has to like you.
her friendship is not some consolation prize.
Despite having been rejected often because I was rather seen as a friend than as a love interest, I've always disliked the whole basic idea of the "friendzone". It implies so much that being someone's friend is not good enough, that romantic relationships are somehow inferior to friendship. If you're someone's friend, you can grow so close to them. You spend time together, you talk to each other, you share experiences and in many cases you can even be as close as hugging or snuggling.
What else could you possibly want from a person you love?
I've resolved this for myself by cherishing the friendships of people I can't be with romantically, and by strifing to feel the same - deep, loving friendship. All I ask from them is to still treat me as a friend, and then I ask from myself to become one - a friend, content with how I'll stay by the side of these people I like so much even after their xth significant other has left them, and the person they insist on nights out with towards the s.o. that stays. I don't need to be called anyones girlfriend to be close to them and share a meaningful relationship with them. And I certainly don't need to torture myself with the delusion that I'd be not good enough for them or that I somehow missed a big opportunity/lost something precious simply because I'm not what they're looking for in a romantic partner. Because that is not true.
Our friendship is precious.
You even mention this connection yourself. What if you told her that you're okay with it, that you don't need anything else but just want to be close to her? And that you can and will grow your feelings into those of a deep friendship soon enough if she gives you the chance?
I'd fight for that connection. For that friendship. It was right to tell her how you feel, but why would you give up on something so precious to you when it's probably exactly what she wants, too?
After all, she valued you as her friend. She might only have been insecure because she was afraid to hurt you.
Oh, and good job finding a way to rhyme penis!