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Vindictive Thoughts.Vindictive Thoughts.

Evil, is knowing better
   
But purposely doing worse.
       
Toying with love by the tether
             
And laughing when it hurts.
                 
Prevailing by any measure
                   
With no intention to reimburse.
                         
Flaunting stolen fabricated treasures
                         
Gaining what you never truly deserved.
                             
To live a life of complete leisure
                             
And never keeping to your words.
                             
Manipulating and applying pressure
                               
Be
GuidanceGuidance.

My father once told me that life is supposed to be a struggle
And that everyone has their own specific type of hustle.

Whether it be working in an office or stacking products on a shelf.
Naturally we all share the same aim of accumulating wealth.

He also told me that nothing is promised in this life time.
When you least expect it the man upstairs will throw you a life line.

Something or someone that will give you a reason to continue.
Awaken the hidden belief and talent that law dormant within you.

He then told me that happiness and success are short lived.
In time your name will both appear and disappear from life's short
SurvivalSurvival.

Give a man a fish he will eat for a day.
Teach a man to fish he will eat for a life time.

Give a man a gun he will rob a bank.
Give a man a bank he will rob the world.

We adapt and adjust.
Constantly dithering on the cusp
Of what is considered wrong and right,
Ensuring that our ambitions remain in sight.

We would be willing to do anything
In order to get what we truly desire.
We would be willing to risk everything
Even putting our friends in the line of fire.

We may share the bounty with others,
Allowing them to experience the fruitful taste.
Given the option we will even care for our brothers.
Just as long as w
Purpose.Purpose.

What would a story be?
If there was no one there to read it.

What would dreams be?
If there was no one there to conceive it.

What would a picture be?
If there was no one there to see it.

What would a secret be?
If there was no one there to keep it.

What would love be?
If there was no one there to feel it.

What would a song be?
If there was no one there to sing it.

What would the truth be?
If there was no one there to admit it.

What would advice be?
If there was no one there to give it.

What would life be?
If there was no one there to live it.

Kela Lewis-Morin
The Connecticut Massacre.The Connecticut Massacre.

He was described as quiet, shy and socially awkward.
He was not the type to be loud, abrasive and forward.

He was highly intelligent and kept his thoughts to himself.
He didn't posses the tools to communicate with anyone else.

Whenever he spoke, his words felt forced and fake.
Who knew back then how many lives this man could take.

The realisation of his isolation was activated by the school premises.
He was never able to see his peers as friends but only as his nemeses.

But when he was home his alienation became none existent.
He was able to laugh and smile without any form of resistance.

The constant contrast
ArtArt.

Imagine...

The world is your canvas.

Society is your paint brush.

The people are your choice of colours.

What kind of picture would you paint?

How would it differ from the image that is currently on show?

Would you go mad and rid yourself from all forms of restraint?

Just how far down the rabbit hole are you willing to go?

I ask because every portrait I create,

Is inspired by what is already in front of me.

So is it possible to even recreate,  

Anything that the mind is not able to see.

The picture will always be the same

Because this life is all we know.

Where there is compassion there must be pain

Because it us who made
Unconscious Epiphany.Unconscious Epiphany.

I thrive and depend on your compliments

And it is only then as a direct consequence,

Am I truly able to write with confidence.

Even though your words are only temporary.

I deem your contribution as utterly necessary,

In order to refresh my wavering, selective memory.

My own validation depends on your approval.

Whether it is congratulatory or discouragingly brutal.

Your input is the one thing that is most crucial.

Can I call myself a writer if I don't believe in myself?

When I constantly seek approval from everyone else?

How can I then expect to make any sort of wealth?

Of a craft and skill I still think any
Fri-end-ship.Fri-end-ship.

When I talk, you don’t listen.

You’re just waiting for your turn to speak.

You view every conversation as a competition.

All I can see is the unstoppable movement of your cheeks.

The flow of communication is always re directed back to you.

Almost as if everyone must hear what you have to say.

I’m not denying that half of what you say could actually be true.

But how can so much happen to a person in just one mere day.

What makes it worse is that your stories get recycled and repeated.

I zone in and out of your speeches and know exactly what happens next.

My place in the conversation is to respond and
Money, money, moneyMoney, money, money.

I laugh even though I don't find it funny.
How stressed I am because of my lack of money.

How much my life actually depends upon it.
How much the fate of my future actually rests upon it.
How easily you can lose friends because of the lust for it.
How friends can become enemies just because of the hunt for it.
My stress levels increase to the point where I have had enough of it.
I bury my woeful head because I know it is impossible to run from it.
Although I will always need money, I will never have any love for it.

Without money would there be such a thing as rich and poor?
Will the streets still be filled wit
Questions.Questions.

Nobody has the answers
But everybody has the Y’s.

Speculations of a faultless green pasture,
Based on a line of best fit that was drawn to lie.

The solution is a sequence of random numbers and dates.
In addition to a complicated sum of love, grief, fear and hate.

Which form a unique equation that can never be revealed.
It’s the only bit of ignorance that still remains concealed.

Even though we may feel defenseless.

The possibilities are endless.

The opportunities are relentless.

Opinions become senseless

And still we lie restless.

Attempting to solve the unsolvable

And control the uncontrollable.

To know th
PerfectionPerfection.

She lodges her fingers down her throat.

Clasping onto the wall as she recklessly chokes.

She reinserts her fingers back in forcibly.

Deliriously trying to make her body thinner.

She swoons and slumps to the floor nauseously

As she attempts to regurgitate her dinner.

Her throat aches as she screeches out coarsely,

With her hand covering the image in the mirror.

Her head now rests on the on the rim of the toilet seat.

She wants to eat but she just has not got in her.

She desperately begins to scream out inaudibly.

Her mouth now tastes of something pulpy and bitter.

She examines the red color of the fluid cautiously.

Re
Wasted Words.Wasted Words.

We wait for the last possible moment.
Even when confronting our opponents.

To reveal,
How we truly feel.

We hide behind our counterfeit expressions.
Conceal and contain our countless confessions.

Failing to announce,
What our mouths long to pronounce.

We purposely squander opportunities.
Maintaining our positions within our communities.

Avoiding any disclosure,
Reducing the risk of exposure.

We use humour to dilute what we actually say.
Because the truth does not have to be revealed today.

We know there always is a tomorrow,
So today has not got to be filled with sorrow.

We wait and wait.

                Stall and pr
Reflected InspectionReflected Inspection

Here I am again examining my disfigured figure in the mirror.

Fondling my fat wishing I could trim it down with a pair of scissors.

Relentlessly poking, prodding and picking at my face.

Leaving behind nothing but a black, coarse and scabby trace.

Furiously patting down my cheeks begging them to be smaller.

Standing on the edge of my toes willfully imagining that I am taller.

Folding my ears inwards commanding them to decrease in size.

Hysterically trying to find the beauty they said existed in my eyes.

Scrutinizing my nose using my hands to mould it into my desired shape.

Impatiently withdrawing my stomach to wo
The BulliedThe Bullied.

He never enjoyed going to school.
He used to bunk whenever he had the chance.
Although he was not one for breaking the rules.
He refused to submit to their ignorant demands.

He told his teachers about his problems.
How he got bullied every lunch and break time.
They said they would find a rapid way to solve them.
Somehow his confessions filtered through the grape vine.

The bullying became more intense and extreme.
He began wearing long sleeved t-shirts to hide the marks.
He knew his parents would only label him as a troubled teen.
But he yearned for their understanding and supportive remarks.

Eventually he tried tal
One of Many.One of Many.

I'm afraid of your judgments.
I'm afraid of what you will think of me.

So I make subtle adjustments
And become someone you want me to be.

I hide behind my mascara and concealer.
Smile and respond when instructed.

I'm not smart or sexy enough to be a leader.
So I allow myself to become conducted.

I allow myself to become obstructed.
I allow myself to become abducted.
I allow myself to become corrupted.
I allow myself to become artificial.
I allow myself to become superficial.
I allow myself to become egotistical

And live behind a carefully applied screen.
Because my real face can never be seen.

It's easier to act
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More from *KelaLewis-Morin

Friend Zone.Friend Zone.

I just can never seem to get it right.
How can she say that I am not her type?
After the constant phone calls and the facebook messages
And listening to you talk about all of your annoying relatives.
I thought that you and I could’ve been something.
I know now you think all guys are just after one thing.
Especially after the last guy and what he did to you
And I thought since I was the person you came running to.
That maybe, eventually there could be something between us
And you would believe me when I say I am not thinking of my penis.

When I say I long to hear your voice, even if it's only for a little while
And I love
L.O.V.E.L.O.V.E.

It swallows you whole,
Exceeds your control.
Apprehends your soul,
Until it has taken its toll.

It’s an overwhelming feeling.
That is made to be appealing
And you can’t help revealing,
The doubts you are concealing.

It’s an undefined dimple
And a well known jingle.
But only when you are single
Does it all seem so simple.

It is one of life’s many gifts,
That empowers and uplifts
And can lead you adrift.
Should you miss your shift.

It is impossible to describe it.
It is impossible to fight it.
Because once it is ignited
And once you have tried it.

It will take your independence.
You will become used to it
Inside Out.Inside Out.

Do you love my insides?
You know the parts you can’t see.

The parts that constructively divide,
All the places where you can’t be.

Do you love my internals?
You know all my unexploited crevices.

All the words I leave out of my journal.
The soft tissue areas that offer no benefits.

Do you love my fleshy, raw fillings?
You know the boring and bloody parts.

The features that are not made for kissing.
The invisible strokes that add to this body of art.

You see it’s my exterior that attracts you
But it’s my interior that made this possible.

So when my insecurities inadvertently attack you,
Don’t be
The Show Must Go On.The Show Must Go On.

You’re meant to be sad,
As long as the flowers last.
Well at least that’s what they say.
Then why do I still feel bad,
Even though time has passed.
I find myself thinking about you everyday.
After mourning and mourning,
On the dawning of the next morning.
Your unplanned departure will still be daunting.
How am I supposed to grasp your sudden disappearance?
When every time I close my eyes I can see your appearance.
How can I class your death as an untimely interference?
One that is destined to occur throughout my life time and time again.
These engraved names are the people I call my family, confidants and
Man Made the Money.Man Made the Money.

We think that if we had more money everything would be different.
That we would suddenly be able do all the things we always desired.
Because the lives we lead right now have become predictable and consistent.
And should we choose to, we could be the ones that are rejoiced and admired.

We could be the ones on the front cover of every magazine.
We could be the ones appearing on everyone’s television screen.
We could be the ones that the paparazzi haunt and terrorise.
We could be the ones that have our every move televised.
With the aid of money we could have unlimited vacations
And have access to an infinite amount
Wasted Words.Wasted Words.

We wait for the last possible moment.
Even when confronting our opponents.

To reveal,
How we truly feel.

We hide behind our counterfeit expressions.
Conceal and contain our countless confessions.

Failing to announce,
What our mouths long to pronounce.

We purposely squander opportunities.
Maintaining our positions within our communities.

Avoiding any disclosure,
Reducing the risk of exposure.

We use humour to dilute what we actually say.
Because the truth does not have to be revealed today.

We know there always is a tomorrow,
So today has not got to be filled with sorrow.

We wait and wait.

                Stall and pr

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January 4
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Living a Lie.

:iconkelalewis-morin:

Living a Lie.

You say things you don't mean when you're angry.
You call me a waste of space and that you can't stand me.

When the dust settles you say you don't mean it.
You say I should know better than to believe it.

As usual I foolishly upkeep your illusive hold on me.
I allow you to mute my thoughts and take control of me.

You promise and reassure me that it will never happen again.
That this is the last time and you will put it all to an end.

But I know promises only comfort fools,
Who readily allow others to pull the wool

Over our eyes because it is easier to swallow the lies.
Can it be a mistake if it happens more than twice?
Despite my preaching I can never take my own advice.

I've realised that this aggression is a part of you
And because I can never dare to part from you.
I have to believe the love you have for me is true.

Sometimes you have to take a lie not for what it is
But for the truth and reality it suspends.

Withdraw your vengeful tongue and revert it into a kiss.
So we can all carry on living in this false pretence.

Kela Lewis-Morin
:iconkelalewis-morin:
Something I wrote last night whilst lying in bed and decided to map it out on my blackberry lol It was more like a conversation with myself in order to understand while people live in certain situations. When deep down they know it is a lie and the negatives out weight the positives. I hope it works and I hope it makes sense lol Let me know what you think guys :)
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:iconmagic6jewls:
~magic6jewls Feb 18, 2013  Student Writer
Hi, I'm a critic from :thecritiquables:

It's nice that you gave this poem a rhyming scheme. Also, the feeling of being verbally and emotionally abused is a very relatable topic.

However, I'd just like to say that "illusive" is probably not the right word to use. "Elusive" seems more right. Although that'd be your call to make.

Clichéd poem but it really pulls out the emotions in the reader.

Continue writing!
Reply
:iconnykiilynn:
~NykiiLynn Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
i lived this :\ after five years i finally said enoughs enough.
Reply
:iconkritone:
~Kritone Jan 11, 2013  Student General Artist
Hmm... a sad reality we live with in life.
Beautifully put into a short poem.
Reply
:icondkenreeks:
~dkenreeks Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Very good...
Like the bit of hope at the end.
--RKJ
Reply
:iconprincepalmi:
~princepalmi Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This be incredibly good...some of the constructions in it are wonderful, the flow is superb and some of the lines that cross, wow, just wow.
Reply
:iconretrospexx:
~rEtrOspeXX Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I know exactly what you mean, makes perfect sense to me.
Reply
:iconshinobibatchi:
*Shinobibatchi Jan 10, 2013  Professional Writer
It hits me pretty close to home. I just really got out of this kind of thing, and it feels honestly like a good conversation, and holds a lot of truth to it.
Reply
:iconmagicaljoey:
`MagicalJoey Jan 10, 2013   Writer
I like that you have hinted on verbal abuse but never come out and said it bluntly - subtle hints are so much more enticing.
Reply
:iconjtcheney:
~jtcheney Jan 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I agree with Jaybird101. The line "But I know promises only comfort fools, who readily allow others to pull the wool" is a very profound thought, though the wording could be polished.

Overall, I like it.
Reply
:iconjaybird101:
~Jaybird101 Jan 8, 2013
"promises only comfort fools"...man, that line really stands out. The whole piece is great though, well done.
Reply
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